Private Capote Reports form the Field

 Good evening.  My name is Private Capote.  I am a Thoroughbred learning a new job, jumping,  and specializing in the hunter and equitation divisions.  I am owned by Lindsey, the best horse owner in the world.  You ask anyone of my stable mates; they see the carrots coming my way.  I am in training at the Hugh White Training stables.  I had to change my profession three times, and you young folks think you have to be nimble   First I was a race horse, with the tattoo to prove it.  Then I was a lawn mower put out to pasture for four long boring years.  Then I was adopted by the aforementioned Lindsay.  She wanted me to get some more show experience, since this is only my second year with this new gig.  But she was too busy with people-work to show me, so let her friend Joan have the honor.

Now I don't really need a rider, I do know how to jump on my on.  But I am not too swift with reading, and do not know my Arabic numerals at all, so learning the course was a challenge.  Today, for instance, we showed in the Evan Handy Hunter class, a 3 foot class.  What a course.  Trot the first fence, roll back to a bending line, jump a diagonal line away from the gate and up hill that was a 4 and a 2.  Hand gallop a single oxer, and be moving forward over that baby to impress the judge.  Make a tight roll back to another oxer, halt, stand square and still for 5 seconds (I needed Joan for that too, horses don't count), and trot the last fence.  Resume the canter, most conveniently landing on the correct lead, and trot out out the ring.

Upon leaving, some other people-competitors were very nice and complementary of my round that I let Joan participate in.  She replied with the appropriate thanks with the added information that I was a rescue Thoroughbred purchased for five dollars.  Well, I heard that and I raised up my head, Princess style, pinned back my ears, lowered my eyelids and flared my nostrils disapprovingly.  I am not a 5 dollar horse, I must be worth at least $6.50.  But then again, horses can't count.

Yours, Private Capote